Fruggums

No, I'm not blogging from jail (though I would throw a pretty sick 'Free Az All' campaign online if I was)

A month ago I ordered a roundtrip to Jamaica station for a trip to Canada. Its cheaper and it means I don't have to wait in a line with luggage. Tickets arrive in 1-3 business days, usually.

So when they didn't show up for a month I called to ask them to refund me. I thought this would be straightforward but it isn't. Now, things get lost in the mail. Its impossible for every single envelope to be delivered successfully given the volume of mail USPS handles and the sometimes ragged appearance of the people walking around with the mail. So mine was one of those unlucky ones. Ok, they can grasp that concept, even though this a government company.

They send tickets in unmarked non-privacy (which means you can hold it against the light and see its a ticket in there) plain white envelope. 

A few days later I get a form. The usual regrettance-inconvenience schmitz part and then a form I have to send back. It just scared the wits out of me.

Essentially its a legal document that makes me swear that they're actually lost in the mail and I didn't get them. If I'm lying here, I'm lying to the government. There's a lot of the word 'perjury' sprinkled all over this thing. Swearing is alright, I guess. Its the penalties that really got me.

If it turns out, if the ticket that I don't have i.e. somebody else might, gets used, they can prosecute me and fine me $1000 and... send me to prison for a year.

A year.

That's a ridiculous penalty for cheating a railroad company out of $15. For one if the postman who nicked my ticket decided to use it, there's no way to track the person who actually used the ticket, all that's known is that someone used it, someone lied about getting it, someone needs to go to court.

Suppose these ridiculous threats are just deterrents? Well then, to the person who actually had their tickets lost in the mail and signs this thing for a refund, good guts you got there. I'd never sign this thing. Even if one would never end up being convinced and given a sentence, having to land up in court for such a thing is maddening in itself. They can keep their schmeasly $15.

Think about the loss they were to make if indeed someone did cheat them using this system (whichever mad person it would be). They're hauling an extra 60-100kg (on average) for a few miles. Trains can do that pretty ok without posing much of a severe threat to their operation or others' safety. This unlike people with knives and guns walking around who are the people who happen to go to prison too, like this man who cheated the government out of $15 (which isn't enough for more than a day's living in Manhattan)

Just another one of the tales that makes this country so fascinating to study.